FOOD SAFETY - MICROBIAL
Don't Get Sicky Wit It
Don't Be a Gambler
Food Irradiation
I Will Survive
Keep it Cool
Mantenga Bien la Comida
Stomachache Tonight
We are the Microbes
You Better Wash Your Hands

FOOD SAFETY - GENERAL
A Case of Norwalk
Fifty Ways to Eat Your Oysters
Stayin' Alive
U.S.D.A.
Who Left the Food Out

HEALTH & NUTRITION
Eat it
Jump
Veggie Believer

MAD COW DISEASE
Beware La Vaca Loca

PESTICIDES
Bring Back Delaney
I Sprayed it on the Grapevine
Political Hay

OLESTRA
Feelin' All Right

BIOTECH
Clonin' DNA
Frank N. Foode
Still Seems Like Food to Me

TOXICOLOGY
Rat Number 49

ACADEMIC LIFE
Money for Nothing

Don't Be a Gambler
In the style of Kenny Rogers's "The Gambler"


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On a warm summer's evening
Just a while before dinner
I opened up the fridge to get some
Fully thawed ground beef
Then I shaped some patties
And I put 'em on the skillet
Washed my hands for 20 seconds
Any less is just too brief

I fired up the burner
And I fried up the burgers
Cooked 'em till the pink was gone
And the juices ran quite clear
I made sure the centers
Had made it to 160
Then I served 'em to my family
Without feelin' any fear

It's true that home food safety
Is serious business
Keeping foodborne pathogens
From striking day or night
And it may seem hard
To keep taking those precautions
But if you're preparing food, folks,
You gotta learn to do it right

You gotta know when to heat 'em
Know when to eat 'em
Know when to wash your hands
And decontaminate
There's no need to gamble
When you're eatin' at the table
Or you'll be sick in the bathroom
When the evening's late

Every expert knows
That the secret to survive is
Knowin' what to throw away,
And knowin' what to keep
Cause if you're a gambler
You might just be a loser
And the best that you can hope for
Is to die in your sleep

You gotta know when to heat 'em
Know when to eat 'em
Know when to wash your hands
And decontaminate
There's no need to gamble
When you're eatin' at the table
Or you'll be sick in the bathroom
When the evening's late

You gotta know when to heat 'em
Know when to eat 'em
Know when to wash your hands
And decontaminate
There's no need to gamble
When you're eatin' at the table
Or you'll be sick in the bathroom
When the evening's late